I won't say "God spoke to me in a dream" because it was any typical unpredictable, unrealistic, dream where one second you're one place and another second you're somewhere else. But given the tragic events of today I feel like this is a place where I can share my "illumination" if I may be so bold to call it that, and seeing how it was about Jesus, I'll accept the spiritual application.
I was leaving church on a Wednesday night. On the way to the car, I heard a trumpet faintly sounding. Then I heard it again. Given it's quiet tone, I thought "Surely this isn't Jesus coming back." But then I looked up in the sky. The clouds were splitting, and smoke and lightening suddenly appeared. Mom saw it, too. This was it. Jesus was coming back.
I ashamedly thought to myself "I'm not ready for this."
Maybe it was because there were life events yet to be experienced, but upon waking up I was overcome with conviction a) for selfishly desiring earthly things over being with Christ and b) for not living as if He could come back any minute. I instantly started praying. It was just a dream, but I was shaken to the core. How was I spending my time? How was I living? Why had I not been telling people about Jesus? I realized I had gotten so comfortable with my life, and I was disgusted with myself.
Fast forward to today. The Connecticut shooting was all over my newsfeed. So many different reactions all at once "Heinous, Lord have mercy, what if that was me, Jesus come quickly..." I wondered how long will He be patient? How long will He be merciful? Merciful? Yes. Merciful. Every day that we live on this earth that reeks of sin and evil and hurt is a day that we are given a chance to turn from our own wicked ways and accept Jesus' forgiveness and ultimately, His eternal security. I felt like, though I desire to be with Jesus, I could not beg Him to come quickly, when people, especially now, need Him so much. Dad mentioned in a sermon a few weeks ago, "What if Jesus had returned the day before you were saved?" Granted, these are my feelings. God has His timetable, and it will be right on schedule.
No one knows when, but I was reminded yet again, today, that I need to be sharing the Hope I have, speaking the Truth I believe, and living out what it means to be a true follower of Christ... more and more every day. This isn't a guilt trip. This is recalibration; an incredible opportunity. People are searching for hope, comfort, peace, a reason for living, and we have One that will last for all of eternity.
"The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." 2 Peter 3:9
